MY Midwifery
Why gold shoes?
Have you ever read The Country Bunny and the Little Gold shoes? The bunny protagonist is kind, loving, and hard-working. Her little gold shoes give her the boost to make the magic to which she is devoted. I’ve worn gold clogs since completing my RN, and they’ve never let me down. Sometimes a little sparkle goes a long way to break the ice.
Lessons to hold
I wouldn’t be the midwife I am without the counsel and support of many along the way. Support doesn’t always come with gifts, but these two vessels came with two lessons.
The first was made and given to me by an experienced midwife in the Arctic who came to my blessing of the hands ceremony after I finished school. She gave it as a reminder that you cannot pour from an empty cup. Easy words, harder in practice. This cup is my reminder to rest so that I can be the midwife, friend, and family member I want to be.
The second was given to me by a preceptor who went above and beyond to guide me as a student midwife. It is made in the Japanese style of kintsugi which honors breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise or discard. As midwives we witness the way life can challenge and break both us and our clients. I see kintsugi as akin to rebirth, a theme that repeats in midwifery tangibly and metaphorically, a reminder to honor, celebrate, evolve, and rebuild.
Enthusiasm
I love placentas. I think they are the coolest. I will always offer a placenta tour after birth, and if you don’t want to see it, no worries, I’ll just tell you that, in my opinion, you made a beautiful rad placenta, say thank you to the placenta, and cover it up.
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I also think amniotic fluid is the coolest. Did you know it makes a ferning pattern under a microscope? How exquisite is it that such a complex pattern is found in frost, ferns, and fluid? If I check your fluid for ferns I always ask if you want a picture. I take it through the microscope, so it looks like a beautiful full moon of your baby’s own personal ferns.
Image by Allison Holstrom
Midwifery is catching…
and so much more.
When I tell people I’m a midwife, many say how amazing it must be to be part of the “happiest day of someone’s life.” And I love a happy birth, but birth can’t be reduced to “happy”- it can be excruciating, empowering, meditative, marvelous, unhinged, uplifting, traumatic, triumphant, heart-breaking, healing, and so much more. Birth is common and extraordinary. I am here to support the vastness of what birth is and can be.
And I also love the everything-else that midwives are. Finding someone the perfect method of contraception, sharing ways to relieve discomforts of pregnancy, bringing more attention and care to the postpartum period, holding space for the unfairness of infertility and pregnancy loss. Midwifery is supporting sexual wellness, life goals, preventative health screening, the transition through menopause, and more. I love the whole kit and caboodle of what midwifery is, not only the joyful births.
"A person tended to see herself as a streetlamp on a misty night, at the center of a sphere of radiance, but that was a trick of the light, an illusion of centrality in a general fog. A laboring woman, though, while she endured her labor, lay at the center of something truly radiant in four dimensions; every birth everywhere, all the vectors of human emotion and migration originating and terminating at the parting of her legs."
- Michael Chabon, Telegraph Avenue